When he gets on one knee and asks you to be his forever, the world stops spinning. You feel like you're in a movie and you say the word that everyone will squeal about when you re-tell your engagement story for the 150th time: "YES".
You said yes. You post the ring picture on Instagram. You change your status on Facebook. The word "fiance" feels awkward and thrilling when it rolls off your tongue. The green of the trees is no longer "green" but "emerald" cause you're in planning mode with wedding colors on the brain.
If you've ever been engaged, you know that the engagement period is a little bit more than that dazzling rock on your finger, practicing your new signature and bridal showers.
Being engaged can be a lonely time. It can be difficult. It can be stressful. It can be downright scary.
Life is on pause. You're no longer single, but you're not yet married. You still write "Ms." but you're starting to already feel like a "Mrs." In a few months, you'll be solely your husband's, but for now, you're still a little bit your's, a little bit your parent's. Life is in the in-between, you don't quite fit into "Single" or "Married'.
Saying yes to him can mean saying yes to drama and unwanted opinions. Saying yes to him can mean saying yes to questioning your decision, fear of committment, issues that were once buried surfacing in your heart. Saying yes to him can mean saying yes to stress on stress on stress. Saying yes to him can mean saying good-bye to relationships that aren't ready to see you move into a new stage of life. Saying yes to him can mean saying yes to smiling on the outside, but crumbling on the inside.
Being engaged can be one of the best times of your life, while simultaneously being one of the most stressful, yet no one stops to ask how you're doing because you're engaged! You must be wonderful all the time!
If you're engaged, know that you are not alone and you are not crazy for feeling overwhelmed, scared, or sad. Life will do that to you. So how do you stay sane in a wedding whrlwind?
Take time for you.
Do something that isn't wedding related regularly. Take time to get a massage just cause. As it gets closer to your wedding, take time to go be alone and reflect on everything. Put things that are important to you first, and don't get lost in the wedding planning timeline.
Remember this new life is about you and your groom. Not about your in-laws, your friends, or your parents. So you need to stay close to your future hubby and stay united as a team. Have each other's backs and support each other through this time. You're in this together and this will help with the next tip, which is...
Holy smokes. This is totally the most important one in my opinion. You have to set boundaries with people in your life. You will not be able to please everyone so get it through your head now. Be firm and consistent with letting family and friends know what they can do to help. When you say, "No", mean it. And remember, it IS okay to say no. It's okay to let people down because it isn't their wedding. It's your's. So YOU decide if other people can have a say in the decision making process, and let it be that.
This is a season of awkwardness, stress and at times, loneliness, especially if none of your other friends are engaged or married. Let yourself feel all the emotions. Let the apartment get messy. Go back to your bridesmaids and tell them you changed your mind again. Have grace. This is your season of life.
Don't get so wrapped up in the wedding planning that you lose yourself. Remember what is most important and stay grounded in the moment. Be fully there in each moment, because you will most likely never have this season of life again. Treasure each second of this season because it will be over before you know it!