Had lots of work to get done today but instead spent the day making macrame essential oil car fresheners...so..... 🤷🏻‍♀️💕

REMINDER: Love is not manipulation. It is not passive aggressive. It is not unwilling to accept responsibility for actions. It is not unsupportive or unkind. It is not cold. It does not ignore or use the silent treatment. It doesn’t require others to comply with its demands. It doesn’t call names or forget plans with you. It does not belittle, make sarcastic comments at your expense or embarrass you in public. It does not forget to ask you questions or invest in your life. It does not solely speak about itself. It does not brag in order to watch you shrink and feel small. It does not withhold affection until you act “right”. It doesn’t depend on others for happiness. It does not buy your affection or hold things over your head. It does not control, blame or isolate. It is not jealous of you. It does not hold a grudge for weeks, months, or years on end. It doesn’t ignore boundaries. It doesn’t meddle or talk behind your back. It shouldn’t make you feel sick to your stomach when it calls or shows up. It doesn’t dredge up the past. It doesn’t exhaust you, mentally or physically. It doesn’t hurt you physically, emotionally or spiritually. It isn’t co-dependent, enmeshed, immature or lazy. If it is, then it isn’t love- it’s toxic and it’s abuse. If it is a boyfriend, girlfriend, spouse, mom, dad, sibling, cousin, co-worker, friend, neighbor, grandparent- get out. Know you are worth more than being treated like someone’s garbage. You are worthy of respect, dignity, freedom, independence, affection and time. You should only have people in your circle who BRING YOU UP • CHEER YOU ON • SPEAK POSITIVITY • SUPPORT YOUR CALLING• CALL YOU TO HIGHER. You are not sinful, selfish or rude to cut ties with people who are toxic. You are not obligated to ANYONE who is dysfunctional. Speak truth in love, draw a boundary line and have enough respect to know you are worth so much more than being bruised by people who use you and abuse you // Love will walk through it all with you, even when you try to quit every second. Love is personified in my perfect husband who is gold-hearted in every sense and makes this world a better place just because he’s in it. 💕🤟🏼

Here’s to the Monday-est Wednesday ever. 🍷🤪

Almost 1️⃣ month until St. Patrick’s Day ☘️This is your reminder to pursue your fun, silly dreams. Find what FILLS YOU- no matter how random, dorky or late in the game you feel. I’ve been relearning Irish dance about 6 months now, which is huge because I rarely push myself out of my comfort zone but it has been the most fun, rewarding adventure. Here’s the St. Patrick’s Day Set- a dance from Ireland that has been passed down from generation to generation for hundreds of years. The second video is me last week- couldn’t finish the dance and frustrated. The first video is after a week of practicing every single day- almost finished the whole set (kinda fell apart at the end though) and fast enough to do to music. 🥰☘️ Have fun, try your best and don’t take yourself too seriously. 🤪

Learning to have fun more often. Learning that slowing down is productive. Learning that spontaneity can be therapeutic. Learning that a Sunday drive after church to Pennsylvania is the kind of Sabbath I needed. 💕

Final night with the keys to our apartment. Four years in our first little home. It was the place that ended years of long distance. It was the place we spent our first day as a married couple. It’s where I sobbed my eyes out when he sat me on the sofa and told me he lost his job 6 months after our wedding. It’s the place where we laughed at our psycho neighbors, drank too much wine and stayed up too late, had game nights and sleepovers with our fave peeps. It’s where we got our first dog. It’s the place where we spent too much time at the pool and made alliances...I mean, friends...with the not-so-psycho neighbors. It’s where Brandon put out a dumpster fire at midnight while wearing his boxers and a crop top (long story...) and it still makes me laugh to think about it. It’s where the people we loved had a key and watered our already-dying plants when we were away. It’s where we learned to rough it. It’s where the dishwasher didn’t work, there was a wasp nest outside our window, and the floor was slanted so stuff rolled off the dresser. It’s where we learned that it didn’t matter what we had, but who we were with. It’s where we were broke AF college kids, trying to figure shiz out. Dang, Remy 203 was good to us. I mean, it was also an annoying pain in the patootie to live there too...but it built character. Saying goodbye to the chapter of our lives where we are ghetto college kids....SIKE. Still the same ghetto kids you know and love from the 21234...just down the street. Literally.✌🏼🏡

First night in our new house. 🏡

Feeling really fragile all day and for the first time ever, I recognized that I felt this way and that is was OKAY to take care of myself. So no workout today, time spent with family, no lesson planning or grading, breakfast for dinner, journaling, tea and late night vinyls. 💕✌🏼

He wrote me a book about how we fell in love and I am pretty sure it’s the most thoughtful gift in the whole world. 💕😭👰🏻🤵🏻

Turns out that I’m not responsible for other people’s happiness, unhealthy decisions, lack of boundaries, guilt, victimization, toxicity, choices, lack of communication, passive aggression, unkind words or blame. Who would have thunk that I’m not obligated to call, text, see, spend time with, give money to, defend, excuse, or think about people who put toxicity in my life? •• Is this what life is like for people with healthy boundaries? I feel like I can take a deep breath for the first time in years. •• I spent so many years thinking that God wanted me to turn the other cheek + let people walk all over me. I thought that love thy neighbor meant tolerating toxic people because they are lost. I thought boundaries made me a mean person. •• Turns out I read it all wrong. God isn’t a God of abuse, toxicity, or being a slave to the demands of others. God calls us to be a people of FREEDOM + STRENGTH. Sometimes, turning the other cheek is waking away, with forgiveness and peace in your heart. Sometimes, boundaries and saying “no” is the kindest thing you can do. •• Love is not enabling. Louder for the people in the back, LOVE IS NOT ENABLING. •• Love doesn’t suffocate, control, depend on others for happiness, guilt trip, blame, refuse to accept responsibility, ignore, deflect, enable, triangulate, insult or victimize. •• I will never again be ashamed, scared or timid when declaring this in my life.

My word for the year is LAUGH. It was going to be JOY, but I feel like, for me, it needed to be LAUGH because I need the type of joy that takes your breath away, hurts your abs, puts tears in your eyes, blocks all other thoughts, connects you to others and tells the world, “I HAVE NO FEAR CAUSE LIFE IS FUNNY AND IT IS ALL GOOD” I let last year steal my joy and my peace. That is NOT HAPPENING this year cause that’s not what my God has for me. My verse for the year is “She is clothed with dignity and strength and laughs without fear of the future.” WHO IS WITH ME?! 💕

I started this year with the word COMMUNITY. But really, all this year felt like was the word LOST. • • I didn’t have it in me this year. A lot was thrown my way and I buckled. I’m just trying to keep it real- this year felt like a fail. • • It was the year that I faced INSANE challenges professionally, in my marriage, in my friendships, in my health, in my relationships, in my finances. • • Everything felt like it was crashing down in 2018. I would win a battle and then two weeks later, another obstacle would smack me in the face. Eventually, last month, I realized that I rarely did anything for fun or just ‘cause. I let life take over. I let it wear me down. • • It’s okay to have days, weeks, months, seasons- or even years- like this. It’s life. You brush yourself off and get back up and make life awesome. • • So here’s to 2018- the good and the bad. Here’s to three years of marriage. Here’s to stupid arguments with your husband and staying up too late talking over wine. Here’s to adopting the sweetest little pup we didn’t even know we needed. Here’s to broken down cars and emergency room visits. Here’s to apartment renovations and broken dishwashers. Here’s to sending letters to our friends in Africa and awkwardly trying to make friends in our 20s. Here’s to turning 25 and having a quarter life crisis. Here’s to therapy appointments and awkward silence on too-comfy sofas when I don’t want to talk about my feelings. Here’s to friends found in unlikely places (like on the Internet) who love the mess outta me. Here’s to a trip to Chicago and cancelled plane rides. Here’s to new jobs and budgets. Here’s to cheering our people on through weddings, and babies and loss and new jobs, oh, my! Here’s to making hard choices and setting boundaries. • • A verse that was laid on my heart at the beginning of this year was “See if I will not throw open the floodgates of Heaven and pour out so much blessing that there will not be room enough to store it.” • • I believe that will come to fruition in 2019. This was the refining year, the processing year. The year of drought and famine and fire. But next year- oh, just wait. 2019 is gonna be our best year yet.

I always miss my Grandma at Christmas. We had a complicated relationship and words were left said and unsaid when she passed away a few years ago. Especially this year, our complex relationship has felt close and raw. I have felt the weight of her sometimes harsh words more than ever this season. And it just makes me sad. • As I was packing up my tree today, I noticed how 75% of my ornaments were from or belonged to her. • Like the Irish dancer she got me when I was 7 years old. She was so excited I was embracing her Irish roots by taking Irish dance classes. The ornament she bought me felt like a sign of approval, a true gift of love. I was absolutely devastated + crushed when I realized, earlier this season, that the ornament somehow got lost. My mom bought me a replacement ornament that was just like the one she gave me and it has been my favorite gift this season. • Or the London ornament she bought me a few months before she died. When I told her I was studying abroad in England for a summer semester, she beamed with pride. She told me she was proud of me and that she wished she had seen more of the world. She bought me this ornament when I left in July but wrapped it and kept it hidden until December. She never got a chance to give it to me because she passed away in November. My aunt found this gift in her apartment and placed it under the tree for me that year. It was the best surprise ever. It’s broken but it’s my favorite ornament on the tree. • Or the mice ornaments my grandfather would buy her every year. They are sprinkled throughout my tree and make me miss the magic of Christmas through a kid’s eyes. • There are still wounds I carry from my relationship with her because all families can be messy. But as I put away these beautiful treasures, I realize that she showed her love through Christmas. She made every year magical and perfect. She was intentional and thoughtful with her gifts in a way that made you feel so special and seen. What she never said with her words, I feel now with her gifts that will last me years and years to come. • I hope I will always carry on her legacy of making moments magical.

This time of the year is a GREAT time to purge your home of clutter. Get rid of the old things you don’t use or don’t serve you or don’t bring you joy. • Make sure you bring whatever is gently used or still in working condition to a thrift or secondhand store to avoid it going to a landfill. Or give it to a friend or neighbor. Find a way to reuse it or repurpose it. Heck, try to sell it on @ebay , @poshmark , @letgo , @facebook or @mercari • Which also makes it a good time to go thrift shopping because SO many people are getting rid of their things so the stores are stocked full of goodies. Plus, TODAY is Goodwill’s Super Saturday Sale where everything is 50% off. • Tips for finding the best stuff? • 1️⃣ Head to the thrift stores that are in nicer areas of your city. One man’s trash is another man’s treasure has never been truer. 2️⃣ Try on everything! You never know until you try it on! 3️⃣ Double check for wear and tear. I try not to buy items that have too much wear unless it is something simple like a stain or a small hole. But unless you LOVE it and are super motivated to take it home and nurse it back to mint condition, skip it. 4️⃣Don’t buy it simply because it’s cheap or name brand. Only buy it if you LOVE it and would buy it full price. 5️⃣ Hit up a variety of stores. No two thrift stores are alike. • If you’re in the Baltimore area and want some suggestions on the best thrift stores to hit up, message me and I’d be happy to share my faves with you! 😍 #AnnieGetsThrifty

Merry Christmas to all 💕 But especially to those who are going through their first (or twentieth) Christmas without a loved one. Going through unexplained medical issues or cancer or depression. Those who couldn’t afford gifts this year and feel ashamed. Those with confusing, frustrating and unhealthy relationships in their life. Those who feel that material possessions are the only thing that can fill you but it isn’t working. Those with a broken marriage and a broken heart. Those out of a job or a car or a house. This is your holiday. Because Christmas is about HOPE in the darkness. If your life feels dark, if you are weary...this is YOUR day. This is the day that God saw you in your situation + sent you HOPE. // A thrill of HOPE, a WEARY world REJOICES...Christ is THE Lord. ✨

The best way to spread Christmas cheer is....giving everyone a candy cane and putting on a movie to survive the last 30 minutes of the day. 🙃🎄

Six years ago today, we went on our first date in NYC. Today, we celebrated by spending a day in NYC and taking Brandon to see his first Broadway show! Today was perfect. Except that I had to fight 5.6 million people to get a picture in front of this friggin tree. 🥴🎄But other than that, totally perfect. 💕

My 90s heart loved seeing Anastasia at @hippodromebway with my sister today 💕 thanks, @alliejoyduhhhh for the Christmas gift and being my date! 👯‍♂️

All I want for Christmas is for our dog to look like she actually loves us in photographs. (I swear she does!) Anyways, the halls are decked and all the cheesy Christmas movies, featuring a predictable love interest and a made up European country, are being watched. 🎄🍾🐶

Whatever happened over this past year, be thankful for where it brought you. Where you are is where you’re meant to be. ✨